Karaoke with Chris: archive

If a karaoke host gets sick does he not, uh... if a tree falls in the woods and it hits a deaf guy in the... well... okay.

Here. If a bear 'unloads' in the woods, and the temperature is 77 degrees with the wind is blowing downhill in the direction of your tent opening at a speed of 11 kn, does it not truly reek? Yes friends it does! Equally stinky is the fact that I am unable to run the karaoke contest this weekend due to a nagging bug that I have been wrestling. I will spare you the gory details, suffice it to say the bear story is much more pleasant.

So what does that mean for karaoke in and of itself? Well there is NO CONTEST on the 10th, but damn it there WILL be some sort of karaoke, some how. I will try to find someone to fill in, and if I can't find a suitable sub, maybe I might be able to just lurk in the back in my sickness feeling all bad to myself spinning YOUR songs. But if you are itching to compete (for cash and prizes!) we are moving the date:

Saturday, February 24th

Gio's Post-Valentines Karaoke Massacre!

Judges and contestants are urged to arrive at 9:30!

For additional info, see post below.

POSTPONED: see above post.

Mmmmmm... you can smell it, romance in the air, the unstoppable war machine of Hallmark, Whitman, American Greetings, Russell Stover and FTD. And the Carlyle Group: “Nothing says love like Carlyle!®” But I digress. If on February 10th you find yourself without a romantic plan — hell, even if you HAVE a plan (scrap it) — join us at Gio’s as we are going HEAD-TO-HEAD for another round of the singers’ deathmatch that is our FUN-FOR-ALL karaoke contest!

Once again, this is a FRIENDLY competition! And in the SPIRIT of friendly competition I have made up some critical new rules:

• The previous winner (in this case Erin Lane) is not allowed to compete.

• Other previous contestants are elegible, but are ENCOURAGED to pick new songs.

Of course if Erin Lane is out there (?) she is absolutely welcome back to sing any song she wants and she will be greeted ceremonially!

Winners will score some cool prizes (including the excellent first place prize of $100 cash) that you can use on your favorite Valentine, or greedily spend on your selfish selves. Who are we to judge? Well, er, except the contest that is...

All singers really need to be registered by 10pm. Late entries will be annoying, I can’t promise you will get in. Contestants will get at least 2 songs. People who choose not to compete can sing as time allows. additional info can be found here if you haven’t already seen it.

Judges and other helper-outers, please be available at Gio’s by 9:30. Matt? 9:30? Matt??? Oh and by the way Yosh will be ditching us that night so feel free to pelt him with rocks when you see him next. I can provide the rocks on request.

Our first stab at a karaoke contest was met with resounding success! No open singers felt too jilted, and the audience responded as each contestant upped the ante. It was quite a spectacle to say the least, and for those of us running the show had plenty of fun too!

Congratulations to our first-ever winners:

• 1st Place: Erin Lane doing "Come To My Window" and "Whole Lotta Love"

• 2nd Place: Ted Jay with "Ain't No Sunshine" and "Sweet Transvestite"

• 3rd Place: Chris Cieslak and his energetic "Whip It" and "Its the End of the World"

Special runner-up performance award went to Nate Stoner and his rendition of Alicia Keys' "How Come You Don't Call Me" (which is an old Prince B-side) -- too sex-ay!

Let’s give kudos to the other contestants: Keri, Paul, Annie, Dutch, Ayman (D’OH so close!) and Heidi, for raising the bar beyond what we usually get at our little show. Thanks all, you folks worked it hard and it showed. A shout out to my judges: Yoshiki, Lori, Leah and Matt "Just In Time" Russell and as always, thank yous to Gio's and Terry at Krazy Karaoke.

You can see the award page and original flyer info here. And keep an eye (and ear) towards February 10th, the target date for our next contest!

This holiday season, Gio’s and I are GIVING OUT PRESENTS! However, to keep things interesting, we are going to make you sing for them!

Saturday, December 16th marks our first karaoke contest. This is a FRIENDLY (remember the word friendly?) competition where the winners will score some cool prizes, including the excellent first place prize of $100 cash! Yes, we know some kiddies are going to walk away with nothing, but that is the hallmark of our capitalist society! And besides if this goes well said loser kids get to try again at the next one! Of course if you are a good boy or girl there is always Santa, but that is between you and him.

All singers really need to be registered by 10pm. Late entries will be annoying, I can’t promise you will get in. Contestants will get at least 2 songs. People who choose not to compete can sing as time allows. additional info can be found here if you haven’t already seen it.

Judges and other helper-outers, please be available at Gio’s by 9:30. I LOVE YOU GUYS!

Guaranteed good times, let’s get freaky-deaky! Winners will be posted here, stay tuned!

Well, I had to take time off sooner or later, and here it is: I am not hosting the night of April 22nd. As such, this marks the return of Gio’s pioneering karaoke host, Josh Ryder! This is like having Carson guest host for Leno! Well, except Jay Leno is awful, and I certainly hope I am NOT awful... And also the fact that Johnny is dead, but Josh is still very much alive. Is any of this getting through???

Dawn, a local at Gio’s, used her ultra-keen observational capacity to level this allegation (I call it an attack) at me: “Chris, the only dance you know how to do is the ‘running man’!” This hit me hard like an old plane plowing right into the side of a barn. I was stunned, I couldn’t breath, although perhaps some of that was due to the fact that I had been dancing -- though NOT doing the ‘running man’ thank you very much!

Lets be honest. I am no stranger to the art of dance, and my experience in swing choir and theater will bear this out. I know all the essentials -- the code, if you will -- of dance: jazz hands, keep your toes pointed, always smile, and ‘Chris, stop #@%$! stepping on me!’ These painful lessons have elevated me BEYOND dance.

I have my own style now, and while I might bring out the ‘running man’ for comedic affect, I am far more likely to bust my own signature moves such as the ‘giddy running man’ or the ‘frantic running man’ or ‘flail-your-arms-in-the-air running man’ to keep the crown entranced.

‘Running man’ indeed!